Saturday, 9 April 2011

A new chapter in my life

Dear Blog Readers,

As you may know, I haven’t posted anything in over a month. Since the start of my school year, actually. I am so so sorry. Not only to you, but to myself as well. I began this blog half a year ago as a different person – young, naive, ignorant and a complete book addict.

Throughout last year, I was so focused on reading and blogging that it became a huge part of my life. My grades started slipping, and I stopped speaking to my friends as much.

Despite that, I loved that period in my life. There were just so many books out there, waiting to be read, so many worlds lined up neatly on my bookshelf, just waiting to be discovered. It was so thrilling to see books land on my doorstep, and I loved the joy of opening the packages and squealing with joy at the treasures inside, as if Christmas came every week. I would browse every bookstore I came across, and my heart flipped every time I saw books that I recognised from the blogosphere. Every time I wrote a review, I felt a sense of accomplishment. Every comment that popped up spread a grin over my face and every nice thought I read gave me a warm fuzzy feeling. And as I gradually made friends with my favourite bloggers, I never imagined that I would ever want to give this up.

But the coming of the new year marked a the beginning of a new chapter of my life. Since school started, I’ve had to adjust, to a new environment, a more specialised selection of subjects, a new expectation from teachers and completely different social dynamics. I’ve always been academically inclined, and over the past two months or so, I’ve been under more collective pressure than ever in my entire school life. I feel as if I’m always struggling to keep up with my schoolwork, hanging on by a thread. I’ve had little time for sleeping, yet alone reading and blogging. I even started avoiding my bookcase out of guilt, which before, was my favourite spot in the entire house. Reading was becoming a part-time job, a small liability, and less about the escape and more about the expectations.

This is why I feel that I’m at the stage in my life where I have to put reading on the back burner, until I have the time, money and interest again.But I’ve put so much time and effort into my blog, and I don’t want this to be another project I’ve let fallen by the wayside. I’ve never thought much about personal blogs, but just writing this personal post has felt like a much needed breath of fresh air a metaphorical loosening of tense muscles and stress. After writing something (that isn’t schoolwork) for myself, I’m left with a very positive feeling. I think I have an idea for where this blog could be headed….

In the meantime, I want to leave you with two songs that I’ve been listening to recently. I’m not quite sure what genre they are…I can’t seem to identify what my favourite genre is. Perhaps it’s similar to one’s identity – there’s never a label that fits just right.

All About Your Heart – Mindy Gledhill: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGsU4vuJAIo

Giving it Up for You – Holly Brook (aka. Skylar Grey): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIjpK5J2AtA

10 comments:

Sas (Tea Mouse) said...

Hey Tina,

It's wonderful to hear from you! I was actually planning to email you to see if all was well, but you got there first. :)

I'm sorry to hear that you don't have the same enjoyment out of reading that you did a year ago, but people change and as long as you're happy with who you are then it's okay. I'm glad that you're finding yourself and experiencing these crazy new things.

School can be stressful, but maybe I can pass on a bit of advice here; don't let it get to you. Sure, study, do your best and make the most of school, but don't let it rule your life. I finished school last year and now that it's all said and done, I've realized that I put a lot of worrying in to something that didn't mean that much in the end. Sure, I miss school and everything it offered - but the stress that it put me through wasn't worth it. No one cares about your school grades once you're in uni. They're important, but they aren't forever and they aren't your life. So enjoy school and don't take it too seriously, okay? ;)

Maybe you'll come back to blogging books someday, and I hope you do; but for now, I'm happy to read what's going on in your life.

Miss you bunches Tina!!

x

Romi said...

That's terrific of you, putting it out like that...
Well done.

Brittany @ Nice Girls Read Books said...

Aw, it'll be sad to see less of you - but I do understand. When you reach a certain amount of followers and all those expectations mount up, blogging and reading seems to be more of a chore and the fun begins to get sapped out of it due to deadlines. Personally I haven't read anything in a couple of weeks now (I'm on a reading slump) and I'm feeling awful about it. I think the important thing is to remember WHY you did it in the first place, etcetera. and just keep that aspect of fun and carefree-ness about it :)

As for your real life situation, awesome. I remember when that was me and all these teen expectations I draw from my favourite books started to materialize into my own life. It's something you have to go out and enjoy :)

Either way, I'm sure we'll see each other around still! xx

Nel said...

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Blueicegal ♥ said...

I was missing you and your awesome blog, so I thought I would hop over and say that I hope things are going good, that life isn't too hectic and that maybe you might have found your love for reading once again. I hope you come back to us someday :)

Toyin O. said...

Thanks for sharing these videos:)

Miss Durst said...

Tina, it's good to hear from you again, even if it's a sort of PAUSE. Priorities change and then change again - it's all okay. Please remember that when adults are asked what the most stressful times in their life were, they practically never say "Year 12". Once it's done, it's done, even if it doesn't feel that way right now. I'll look out for you! Miss Durst

Misty said...

Wow that was really heart felt. You read wiser than you are old. Best luck with the future.

Alyssa from James Patterson Book List said...

The older you get the more you will realize that boys aren't really something you should be concerned about in any stressful way...

Live*Laugh*Love said...

Hey I am a newest follower on your blog it would be so nice if you could follow me back also :) thanks again

Tara

P.S. Look out for giveaways on my blog site

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